[oc] thoughts I had when my brother went missing

posted by u/throwawanonchat · 2026-11-07 08:26 UTC

I grew up going to church. I believed in god, once.

But when my brother disappeared, I couldn't believe anymore because if god was real, that meant hell was real, too.

And if the choice was between never seeing him again or believing that he was in hell, it would probably be for the best if he was just gone forever.

## Top comments

1. u/Made_Bail · 2026-11-07 08:31 UTC

Incredible art. Incredible comic. So much in so few pages.

I don't know if this is autobiographical or not, but either way. Just so good.

2. u/throwawanonchat · 2026-11-07 08:38 UTC

Thank you, that means a lot, these are real thoughts I had when my brother died

3. u/That1_IT_Guy · 2026-11-07 13:28 UTC

I had that same thought as a kid after my older brother committed suicide. If he's supposed to go to hell for that, from one suffering to another, then it's better that heaven and hell don't exist.

4. u/rillip · 2026-11-07 16:00 UTC

It's all made up. Make up your own rules if you want. God doesn't have to be a merciless bastard if we don't want them to be. If belief in the afterlife is comforting to you, then believe in one that comforts you. You don't have to listen to ancient books and old perverts.

5. u/Shades1374 · 2026-11-07 16:36 UTC

100%

But also, even believing in the Christian god does not require suicide-to-punishing-hell as a lens.

6. u/Celticlady47 · 2026-11-07 14:41 UTC

I'm so very sorry that your brother was in such pain. I've had a few too many personal experiences with it, (knowing a 13 yr old child was the worst, and for my husband 2 of his students over a 30 yr career committed suicide).

I hope that you have been able to get help for your pain. (((((Hugs)))))

7. u/Made_Bail · 2026-11-07 08:41 UTC

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Your art and your words are such an incredible tribute. This comic blew me away. ❤️

8. u/Locogators · 2026-11-07 12:23 UTC

This is ... so sad. I hope you're doing okay.

9. u/sumcal · 2026-11-07 14:10 UTC

Sorry to hear about your loss.

If it does make you feel any better and you're still wrestling with your faith, most modern day ideas of what Hell is like come from Dante's Inferno. Many Christians believe that Hell is a place where the soul is simply destroyed, not eternally damned, which would mean those we love will just be gone and not eternally tormented. It's the best way I've been able to reconcile a loving God with the idea of Hell and it does make sense Biblically. Not trying to preach but wanted to present an idea I find helpful in the face of grief while trying to wrestle with faith.

10. u/camthesoupman · 2026-11-07 14:43 UTC

I hope youre doing ok now, im so sorry for your loss. I have no brothers or sisters by blood, but if I lost the ones I do have through fate, id be hurting bad.

11. u/JustARandomGuy_71 · 2026-11-07 09:58 UTC

I don't believe god exist, but if it does, I would not believe he would be so petty to send someone to Hell just because they didn't believe in him. You can't create someone imperfect and then get pissed when they make mistakes. Some people seems to have such a bad opinion of their god it is hard to believe.

12. u/VulcanHullo · 2026-11-07 11:29 UTC

The former priest of my rural German parish rustled feathers when he had one of his Righteous Rage moments and during a sermon basically declared that noble atheists will see heaven before even a single "Christian" who enacts evil and spreads hate gets to the gate.

It was just after Trump's election, he had thoughts. I miss him.

13. u/SkadiWindtochter · 2026-11-07 11:41 UTC

I had a similar experience with one priest in a big German city who went all in on a very nice sermon on human responsibility to each other, including the other creatures on this planet, and how voting for people whose main purpose was to spread hatred was an insult to Christ (it was longer and more explicit what and who he meant). Miss that man. Edit: I moved, he is, as far as the parish website says, still there.

14. u/SamediB · 2026-11-07 13:11 UTC

Wholesome fire and brimstone

15. u/VulcanHullo · 2026-11-07 13:53 UTC

Had his moments. Big fella, pipes for days when he sang, but otherwise actually a fairly softly spoken guy. Then he's get his Fire and Brimstone on and rant that he can bless a car but a loving couple based on gender is forbidden? How foolish is that?

He died just before some German Catholics announced they would perform same sex blessings outside their churches in defiance of the Vatican, and we're fairly certain he would have joined that. Now we have a priest fresh out of an office in the Vatican who has the charisma of an automated answering machine.

Edit: I mean the new town priest, not the new Pope.

16. u/unknown · 2026-11-07 13:03 UTC

[deleted]

17. u/CharlotteLucasOP · 2026-11-07 17:22 UTC

I’m amazed that folks can be shitty in their lifetime and then think that interpreting words written by other humans thousands of years ago will give them some kind of gotcha loophole they can use to debate a deity when they meet their maker and are negotiating to pass through the pearly gates.

God knows every secret of your rotten heart, buddy.

18. u/semisociallyawkward · 2026-11-07 10:52 UTC

To paraphrase Christopher Hitchens: a God that punishes those who do not worship him is no better than Kim Jong Il/Un. A petty narcissistic dictator.

The most charitable interpretation I can think of is the Limbo of Thomas Aquinas - a place for those who did not sin and yet were not saved (e.g., unbaptised infants or unbelievers). It is just supposed to be a perfectly pleasant afterlife in the absence of God. Happiness, but not the beatific bliss of being exposed to God. I can kinda accept that vision. Not punishment but rather... acceptance by God that you don't worship him, being fine with that and just giving you the best version of the afterlife he can in the face of that reality.

19. u/Turbulent_Host784 · 2026-11-07 11:45 UTC

Take the less seething version of that quote.

20. u/JustARandomGuy_71 · 2026-11-07 12:59 UTC

I like the version where Hell is not a place of torture and torment, but just a place where God is not, by His choice. If you don't want to have to do with him, he respect your choice and stay away. So, being without God is kinda like, being without internet. Unpleasant, sure, but you can do.